The fact that she required other lovers onlyreaffirmed the feeling of sexual deficiency that I already felt. Isurrendered to her wishes and allowed her to take new lovers when wemoved back to the UK, whilst promising her I would be faithful to mymarriage vows. We only actually made love a few times and that was in thebeginning of our relationship. After our wedding she made it clear that Iwas not sexually attractive to her.Being a cuckold is a humiliating vocation. Having men walk all over youwhile they service the woman you love without a responsibility in theworld grounds down all remnants of self-respect. I grew tired of the smuglooks I got when I was walking arm and arm with a woman her lovers onlyconsidered to be a convenient fuck, someone who would do the things theirwives would never consider and didn't expect anything in return.Now at least I can feel pride in being a beautiful facsimile of a womanand knowing that real men pay good money to use my body for theirpleasure.. ”And I said “I understand, but I just can't ask him to go out with you or anything, I mean, he would never...” and she looked at me like I was from another planet or something and then she laughed real loud.“No, honey, that's not what I want,” and she pointed at her night stand. “Look in the top drawer.”So I did, and the only thing there was a sex toy, a dildo that was sort of attached to a pair of panties that weren't exactly panties but more like a harness almost, and it looked brand new.“Put it on,” she said and I said “No way!” and then she slammed her fist on the mattress.“Do it!” she said, “Or I'll show your picture to your mom and everyone you know.” And then in her kind voice again she said “Look, you don't even have to take your clothes off, just put it on outside your pants, I don't care.”So I only took my jacket off and I put it on.Lucy's mom unbuttoned her night gown and I climbed in bed with her and I absolutely did not want to do this but maybe a little bit. She spread.
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